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Stuff we can look back on and laugh (or cry). Some things that have lost their novelty over the last 10 years

December 31, 2009

A decade is a long time.  Societal trends change, which means that people and things that were talked about and spent on in 2000 are no longer quite as popular.  I’m still trying to remember if I even had a cell phone at the turn of the millenium.  Regardless, here are some things that we were all about 10 years ago, not so much nowadays.

TRL

I never really understood the whole TRL thing.  Maybe it’s because I never understood why Carson Daly was so popular.  The only thing it had going for it was that it was really the last show on MTV that actually concentrated on the M part.  Anyways, the only good thing to happen during the entire run was when Eminem was being interviewed with Mark Wahlberg and says he’s happy they’re all there like a “fun, happy, funky bunch.”  The pissed off look on Wahlberg’s face is priceless.  I searched high and low for the video clip, but was unsuccessful.

Unfortunately for his health, he probably hit that

I guess they played a few decent videos, too.

  • Update: Video evidence has been found. You can see the Eminem/Mark Wahlberg scene here. Thanks to Michael for the link.

Creed

The most likely reason Creed is no longer popular is because they should have never been popular in the first place.  To all those people who bought Creed albums: you’re the reason all the rest of us had to hear all about Scott Stapp’s love for his family and hour disturbingly religious he wanted everyone to think he was.

The other two are guilty by association

Turns out he liked to partner with Kid Rock in tour bus orgies.  Oops.

Trucker hats

Thanks Ashton.  Because of you the mesh hat started to be profitable again.  there’s a reason they were called trucker hats: because the only people who couldn’t afford nicer baseball-style caps were strung out truckers trying to stretch their mileage to 1200 a day.

Von Dutch? More like Von Douchebag.

Maybe it was just a phase like bell bottoms in the 90’s.  I guess we can only hope it’s not cyclical.

Venture Capitalism

The obscene amounts of money being thrown around was crazy.  Any “venture capitalist” (read: people spending other people’s money) was having an orgasm over every idea about anything on the web, no matter how stupid it was.  Do you remember Boo.com?  No?  Well, they spent $188 million in 6 months trying to get their something-about-fashion website off the ground.  It didn’t work.

 

There were others, too.  Remember Webvan? R.I.P 2001.  eToys? R.I.P 2002.  I could go on and on.

Razor Scooters

I remember people selling these things out of their trunks for $80.  It’s just another one of those “Why didn’t I think of that?’ moments.  Seriously, a lot of people made a lot of money by taking rollerblade wheels and putting them on some metal tubing.

It could have been my ticket...

It could have been a typical fad.  But no, stupid parent had to let their kids ride these things through malls and grocery stores.  I have never been as close to intentionally hurting a child than i was at certain moments with those scooters.  I’m still not quite sure if  they’re as bad as these roller shoes kids are wearing now, but it’s close.

Elian Gonzalez

There have been very few times in American political history that have wasted more time and money on a ridiculous issue as there was on this.  Did the decision of whether or not to keep a kid in the U.S. really need to dominate the news like little Elian did.  His story was tragic, but they just should have sent him back to his father and called it a day.

No mi gusta!

I don’t care if Cuba is still considered a communist country.  The dad wasn’t abusive or an alcoholic or anything like that.  And did they really need to send in a SWAT team to collect a 6 year old?  Talk about trying to over-dramaticize for the cameras.

The pregnant chad

It doesn’t seem like the 2000 Bush vs. Gore election was really that long ago, but it was.  It was huge because, despite losing the popular vote, Bush won via the electoral college.  Never been done before, may never be done again.  And then the drawn out court battle and recount.  Only in Florida.

There's a sex joke in here somewhere...

It doesn’t really matter.  I personally don’t think Gore would have been much better.  Like my wife says, which would you pick if you had to choose between a turd sandwich and a gigantic douche?  Either way, you end up with a turd sandwich or a giant douche.

Boy bands

Who was going to win?  Would it be Backstreet boys or n’Sync?  Who cares?  They both finally decided to let us live peaceful lives very early in the decade.  With the exception of JT still being huge and a few others doing various hosting duties on bad reality shows, our lives have been happily void of all things boy band.

Can you tell which one is gay? If you said Lance, you're wrong. The correct answer is all of the above.

I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but we’re ripe for another boy band explosion.  Think about it.  First there was Menudo and New Edition.  Break.  New Kids on the Block.  Break.  Backstreet boys and n’Sync.  Break…  It’s going to happen soon.  God help us.

This list could be a lot longer, but I’m tired and it’s New Year’s Eve.  But I do have just enough energy to give you a secondary list of some things I hope are gone by 2020.

  • Stupid reality shows (Real Chance at Love, Jon & Kate, Real Housewives, Ray J, etc.)
  • Famous people who are famous for no reason (Paris Hilton, Tila Tequila, Heidi & Spencer)
  • Twilight
  • Nascar
  • Kanye West
  • Skinny jeans
  • Guidos

And these are only a few.  Like I said, I’m tired and my brain is only working at half capacity right now.  Maybe I’ll do a whole post on this in the New Year.  In the meantime, have a great New Year’s Eve, be safe, and make your resolution reachable.  I’ll see you in 2010.  (que up Auld Lang Syne)

4 Comments leave one →
  1. Mark McHugh permalink
    December 31, 2009 1:52 pm

    I think it would be fitting that you pay homage to Homer Simpson whenever you mention Florida from here on out, by following it with “(America’s Wang)”.

    Happy New Year!

    • January 12, 2010 9:32 am

      I told my wife about calling Florida that and she laaaauuuggghhhed. I could do a whole post about dumb things in Florida. Maybe I will…

      Happy New Year to you as well.

  2. February 11, 2010 12:47 am

    i genuinely enjoy your posting taste, very charming.
    don’t give up as well as keep penning due to the fact that it simply that is worth to read it,
    impatient to browse through more of your own content, regards😉

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